of putting pictures up on the wall //

hi!

Thu, 21 May 2009 03:25:33 GMT

i miss a few things...

when i didnt have to mentally not try to think about the future
& when i didnt worry myself to gray hair

when the person whos always there.
was really always there.

& when i knew how to deal with crazy people.. or comfort people.

and also when i knew that any given day my name
would never be forgotten to be mentioned in erin monroes posts.
maybe i existed then? ha.

no. ive grown, and fuck ive still got a long way to go but.

the people who were always just accepting of what they got out of people
(who were hurt sometimes but just let it go)

or just accepted the time they had with one another and didnt push it.
just enjoyed it as it came.

-- yeah, im one of those now.

i have emotion yes.
but i do know now.

take it as it comes. dont always get hurt. or keep expecting too much.
just, take it as it comes. bc one day. it wont-

DRAMATIC EFFECT.

Mon, 12 May 2008 19:30:24 GMT

im back.

posting and all.

hii to the peoples journals i read fom time to time.
andrea, corey, hayley, cbend, and kelsey.

hello livejournal world.

whats up?
and hows your summer?

ignore this.

Sun, 30 Dec 2007 03:31:08 GMT

RANT.RANT.RANT.

basically all this is and will be.

fuck this

fuck feeling sorry for myself and fuck you mostly.
im sick and tired of this bullshit.
its like you dont even care about anyone but yourself. fuck you!

im at home sick. and it sucks balls.
and what sucks even more is i wish someone was here to watch a movie with me
or cuddle with me. or even just to talk to me.

its like ugh. wish i had someone who cares enough to check up on me.
or want to soend time with me.
i wish i had the balls to ignore the world. and just see exactly.
who realizes im missing.

funny?

Wed, 14 Nov 2007 02:53:20 GMT

how a song can sum up exactly how you feel right that second.

and funny how it makes you feel better.
and even more like shit. heh.

food for thought.

Tue, 21 Aug 2007 04:12:29 GMT

idk i dont understand my emotions
i dont understand you.

i dont even know why the fuck
everythings ok til i look at something better
and i just want to cry.

perfection is in the eye of the beholder.
and its hard to see perfection when theres no such thing.

superbad

Thu, 16 Aug 2007 08:42:12 GMT

uhhh i saw superbad last night and..

it was pretty much the most hilarious film ever made...
yep. go see it... now.!

Fri, 27 Jul 2007 09:58:26 GMT

this is how i really think
this is how i use to feel
this is the real me inside me, emotion wise.

i want her back

http://users.livejournal.com/bobo_kitty_/

uehfperingoig

Fri, 27 Jul 2007 08:54:53 GMT

i saw the format tonight for the second time.
and it was pretty much the most amazing
experience in my entire life.

they took me away.
BY STORM.

i talked to nate later on in the night.
and told him all about chelsea.
and how the first single means so much
to all of her closest friends.
and he looks at the song differently now.

siiiiigh.

that boy is so talented.

pls the fact he smokes malboro reds.
and still has the ability to sing
SO amazing and SO high.

gah, theres dream husband! hahah jk geoff!
but yeah basically.

best night of my life,

SUCK IT!

pretty much...

Mon, 21 May 2007 22:29:34 GMT

sooo i need a change.
its coming though.
and soon.

i went to the beach with geoff yesterday it was nice
.. and sandy. heh. i had looooooaaaadddsss of fun!

and im going to nyc monday! im so exctied.
yerp. well that tis all much love <3

Fri, 11 May 2007 23:23:27 GMT

uhm.. well.. yeah. i was gunna mention that.

Sun, 18 Mar 2007 17:43:22 GMT

this is a mess.
and im on the verge of crying
i hate this.
everything.
when i say this. i mean everyone.

so theres so much shit going on right now.
and pretty much everything is going wrong
and NOTHING is right at all.

bc everyones disatified.
and its all my fault.

Mon, 12 Mar 2007 04:25:52 GMT

i want to loose weight
i NEED to loose weight.

im going to loose weight.

Mon, 18 Dec 2006 23:13:30 GMT

so basically this si all i can say.
not being happy but saying you are.
isnt lying.
its being "normal"

being accepted is nothing more than this.
crying on the spot makes u look crazy
but in my world. it makes u more normal.

people need to be more caring
understanding, and in tune with other peoples
up's and down's

regaurdless if they are crying
trying to kill themselves
not eating
drinking themselves to death
smoking too much.

and of course. the excuse "your gunna die anyway"
is a fatal deatht ticket. those words are poison.
so shutup.
and in that being said.
if so would u like me to blow your head off now?

which makes no sense in my case.
for is some one did.
id most likely respond. with. please.

dont get me wrong.
this is in no way a threath or goodbye.
but a truthful window to everyone.

as i know whitney and caitlin have posted.
theres nothing left at school but this

fake hellos
half smiles
drama club that goes nowhere
a dead band tower
ect.

i honestly believe that the band tower has sucked
everything we once loved into it.

idk. i just remeber there being a day we
all we totally be up for hanging out there.
EXAMPLE:

Kayla: hey yall lets go to the band tower tmw night at 12 and camp. ect.
EVERYONE: yea. ok sure!

ha. bad example but u caught my drift.

whenever i write here i know no onw reads it.
but its easy to let eveyrthing out here.
wa easier then writing in a private3 journal
for some odd reasoning.

maybe its bc by some weird instanse someone will read this.

idk. im out goodnight

Mon, 04 Dec 2006 23:21:09 GMT

all i have to say is if i could do it over
i wouldnt. and knowing all i know now.
if i could know it then.

i would tell myself only this-
b/c these things are true.

-no matter how harsh/wrong it sounds
you need to take care of your well being first.
-you only have one chance to live, live it.
-history always repeats itself. no matter what.
-you CANT change anyone. period.
-theres no need to think badly.

this is all.
goodnight.♥

my turn

Fri, 17 Nov 2006 21:31:14 GMT

mines amazing
If your life was a movie...what would the soundtrack be?

So, here's how it works:
1. Open your library (iTunes, Winamp, Media Player, iPod, etc)
2. Put it on shuffle
3. Press play
4. For every question, type the song that's playing
5. When you go to a new question, press the next button

Opening Credits:
blink 182- down

Waking Up:
blister in the sun- violet femmes

First Day at School:
We will become silhouettes- the postal service

Falling in Love:
everythings alright- kimya dawson

Fight Song:
live at the apocalypse carbaret- blood brothers

Break Up Song:
the wanderers guild- armor for sleep

Prom:
november- silverstein

Life’s Okay:
Maps- yeah yeah yeahs

Mental Breakdown:
speack slow- tegan and sara

Driving:
this is not an exit- saves the day

Flashback:
hahahaha ignition remix- r kelly

Get Back Together:
hey scenesters- the cribs

Wedding:
across the universe- fiona apple

Birth of a Child:
c'mon c'mon- the von bondies

Final Battle:
first single- the format

Death Scene:
without you- rent

Funeral Song:
hahahaha circle of life- elton john

End Credits:
danger- mystical

i hope when u read this you faulter a bit

Mon, 06 Nov 2006 21:35:41 GMT

Everyone fucks up.
Everyone makes someone feel bad.

Some point in time youve done it.
Ive done it.

But theres times when you do nothing but try
and people still find ways to turn things around
or they are still the fucking victim
or they still find a way to take things
"the wrong way".

i try. i do.
i try. more than ever. now.
but i cant. bc im finding its a loosing battle.
everything ive ever said/done. is the truth.
i just am sick of crying and feeling like shit
for things out of my reach/control

Mon, 30 Oct 2006 04:31:44 GMT

ive been hurt a lot and gone through a lot.
which is to say nothing in the least.
b/c EVERYONE has.

Which i understand.
this entry is not based on chelsea
but yes im sure she has somewhat to do with this entry.

it hurts to have such good friends fade away.
when you let them know you love them.
or that you care.
even cry about them.
loosing something thats so easy to get back
but only if they're willing//and knowing they arent.

HURTS.
horribly.
im crying.
im a fuckup at times.
i loose it.
im emotional.
im unstable sometimes.
i can hide it.
sometimes i cant.

we all have issues and problems.
not to pin point mine out.
but i see so many people slipping out of me life.

which is the way life is
people go. people stay.
people take things.
people leave things.
you learn.
or you regret.

Thats life.

ily.♥
Jenny.
Leslie.

p/s i miss u hayley

Mon, 30 Oct 2006 04:12:12 GMT

do you read into me?

bc i read into you.

Sat, 28 Oct 2006 12:00:00 GMT

fuck you livejournal.

how ironic

Sat, 21 Oct 2006 21:44:13 GMT

<td align="center"> kkkayla --
[noun]:

A level headed person who always makes the wrong decision

'How will you be defined in the dictionary?' at QuizGalaxy.com</td>

Wed, 18 Oct 2006 20:43:58 GMT

im in love

Sun, 15 Oct 2006 14:14:43 GMT

damnit i feel so useless

ily leslie happy birthday♥

Fri, 06 Oct 2006 01:55:41 GMT

its not my head thats broken
its my heart ♥

Sat, 30 Sep 2006 05:29:21 GMT

BASICALLY... this.

i love the braggs♥

x suck it x

Thu, 21 Sep 2006 20:29:26 GMT

i dont know what i need,
but i need it really bad.